I had an incredible night last night as it relates to growing in my understanding and ability to defend and explain the Catholic faith. First, I almost completed Upon This Rock by Stephen K. Ray. I have entered this period of my life of exploring the Catholic faith I was raised in using my attorney hat. I have never given up the belief that there is but one God with three Persons and everything else in the creeds, but I have kept in mind the question, why should I believe Rome over any other professor of faith?
I am still in the embryonic stages of my studies, but I am finding it hard to dispute C.K. Chesterton's statement, ". . . is that there are ten thousand reasons (why I am Catholic) all amounting to one reason: that Catholicism is true." Upon This Rock exemplifies that testimonial. It is multifaceted and detailed, to say the least. About a third of the way through it I had to stop reading all of the footnotes and just read the text because I was getting so bogged down by the litany of supporting materials that I lost sigh of the author's work.
I have also read the Gospels of Matthew and Mark. My approach to reading the Bible has been that I must first read what Jesus said and taught before I can read what his followers said and taught. The first time through I have simply read the words without reading the footnotes or breaking it down -- further studies I intend to do at a later time. Through those readings, the other readings I have done, prayer, contemplation, meditation and Grace I have come to grasp a fairly elemental understanding of the faith, or so I thought.
My wife and have spent the last week doing some things to help out friends in need. I am exceptionally proud of my wife because of how I have seen her grow in her Love for others (even if she doesn't recognize it as such). That continued last night when a friend of hers sent her a message on Facebook about her husband leaving her -- her husband is one of sadly growing number of persons who call themselves Catholic but don't attend Mass and don't follow the teachings of the Church . . . a number which I could have been counted among no less than 18 months ago. My wife got on the phone with her and somehow the conversation got to religion. (I say somehow, but any conversation with my "agnostic" wife that is longer than 20-minutes always seems to go there.)
Being that the entire conversation was on speaker phone, my wife dragged me into it when it got to religion. My wife and her friend both had lots of questions about Christianity and Catholicism and I was able to answer almost every one of them in a clear concise manner. I am excited about continued growth in knowledge and understanding of MY Catholic faith.
"If you want to be happy, really really happy, use your talents to serve others." - Eduardo Verastegui
The ramblings of a man who fell away from the practice of his Catholic faith, only to return upon the realization that he could no longer call himself Catholic without being fully in union with the Magisterium of the Catholic Chirch. This is about growing up Catholic and growing as a Catholic.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Tiny voice, big lessons
I have had Dish Network for coming up on two years now. I signed up for thinking that I was going to be getting this very nice, very expensive 63-inch LCD TV as a gift from my wife's uncle. After the dish was installed and I was on the hook for a two year contract we discovered the TV was damaged in transit (from Dallas) and the repair would cost almost as much as a new TV. So, I got hooked into the satellite service because of my own impatience.
This impatience reared its ugly head all too often when dealing with this company. Generally speaking, I consider my self a very patient person, sometimes even to a fault. However, when dealing with Dish Network and AT&T I cannot help myself. I think part of it is that they always try to double talk you and make you feel stupid. Of course I know that is no excuse, but it is the only reason I can come up with for my lack of patience when enduring these two companies.
My trouble with Dish began almost immediately. The guy who sold me the service of the phone said my monthly cost would be one price, and my first few bills were higher -- plus I was promised two (2) DVR's and only got one (1). After spending, literally, an hour and a half on the phone with countless people I got them to give me a credit for a year that would lower my price to the amount I was promised. When that year passed, my bill was not the same for any two months for more than six (6) consecutive months -- I don't know how that happens and neither do they. I have had to constantly battle these people for almost two years; luckily my battle it is almost over.
Anyway, this last episode was last weekend over HD reception. It has been going in and out for the last month. It got much worse over the week before week. I was dealing with some customer service rep a week or so ago and used a "robotic" voice to talk to them. My wife thought it was hilarious (and creepy at the same time), so I called about the HD last Friday I used a "country" voice. I really wonder what the person on the other end of the conversation thought when I went into great detail about the show we were watching and why I could not turn off the receiver at that time. I was told to unplug the receiver when I could and call back if it didn't work.
That didn't work and I had to call back on Saturday. My wife said I had to come up with a new voice for this conversation. Given my complete lack of any speck of talent in impersonations I would going to struggle with this. The only thing I could come up with was a soft spoken voice, something akin to Michael Jackson. Anyway, during my hour long conversation with 3-4 different people using that voice I was able to get what I wanted accomplished (have the problem fixed at no cost and to waive my HD charges until its fixed) without getting angry, cussing them out or having my blood pressure shoot through the roof. I certainly gave one lady fits because I wouldn't say no, but I had as enjoyable of a time as can be had such a situation.
How this relates to Catholicism or my spiritual journey? I don't know exactly. I do know that anger is one of the seven (7) deadly sins, and I can use less of that in my life. I grew in meekness as a person by using a meek voice. I grew in recognition of how to subtly express frustration. I learned to be persistent in the face of rejection. I learned to stay within myself while being pushed back on by another.
I wonder if I should not expect to have learned these lessons by now, being in my late 30's. I pose such questions to myself daily and haven't found an answer. I hope to never lose the ability to pose these questions . . . because they always eventually lead to growing personally and spiritually.
"If you want to be happy, really really happy, use your talents to serve others." - Eduardo Verastegui
This impatience reared its ugly head all too often when dealing with this company. Generally speaking, I consider my self a very patient person, sometimes even to a fault. However, when dealing with Dish Network and AT&T I cannot help myself. I think part of it is that they always try to double talk you and make you feel stupid. Of course I know that is no excuse, but it is the only reason I can come up with for my lack of patience when enduring these two companies.
My trouble with Dish began almost immediately. The guy who sold me the service of the phone said my monthly cost would be one price, and my first few bills were higher -- plus I was promised two (2) DVR's and only got one (1). After spending, literally, an hour and a half on the phone with countless people I got them to give me a credit for a year that would lower my price to the amount I was promised. When that year passed, my bill was not the same for any two months for more than six (6) consecutive months -- I don't know how that happens and neither do they. I have had to constantly battle these people for almost two years; luckily my battle it is almost over.
Anyway, this last episode was last weekend over HD reception. It has been going in and out for the last month. It got much worse over the week before week. I was dealing with some customer service rep a week or so ago and used a "robotic" voice to talk to them. My wife thought it was hilarious (and creepy at the same time), so I called about the HD last Friday I used a "country" voice. I really wonder what the person on the other end of the conversation thought when I went into great detail about the show we were watching and why I could not turn off the receiver at that time. I was told to unplug the receiver when I could and call back if it didn't work.
That didn't work and I had to call back on Saturday. My wife said I had to come up with a new voice for this conversation. Given my complete lack of any speck of talent in impersonations I would going to struggle with this. The only thing I could come up with was a soft spoken voice, something akin to Michael Jackson. Anyway, during my hour long conversation with 3-4 different people using that voice I was able to get what I wanted accomplished (have the problem fixed at no cost and to waive my HD charges until its fixed) without getting angry, cussing them out or having my blood pressure shoot through the roof. I certainly gave one lady fits because I wouldn't say no, but I had as enjoyable of a time as can be had such a situation.
How this relates to Catholicism or my spiritual journey? I don't know exactly. I do know that anger is one of the seven (7) deadly sins, and I can use less of that in my life. I grew in meekness as a person by using a meek voice. I grew in recognition of how to subtly express frustration. I learned to be persistent in the face of rejection. I learned to stay within myself while being pushed back on by another.
I wonder if I should not expect to have learned these lessons by now, being in my late 30's. I pose such questions to myself daily and haven't found an answer. I hope to never lose the ability to pose these questions . . . because they always eventually lead to growing personally and spiritually.
"If you want to be happy, really really happy, use your talents to serve others." - Eduardo Verastegui
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Mouthy mouth and virtuous virtues
Seems like only about 30% of the blogs I start get posted because I actually get them finished. Lets hope this one is one of that minority.
The past few days have been such that really make me ponder if it might actually be better to walk away and start a new life that is as selfish as humanly possible. I know that such thoughts are sinful and that I my the proper response should be too pray more and worry less. Like many, I struggle with being grace-filled when times get tough. As a kid I had a smart mouth and I usually let it go whenever challenged.
Real or adult world relationships, both personal and professional, require me to put a governor, if you will, on my mouth What I am finding more and more is that my personal relationship with Jesus demands that I put a check not only on my mouth, but on my thoughts. As I am growing in my faith, I am growing in the appreciation that to Love my neighbor requires me to dial back my pride and my anger and grow in humility and meekness.
This of course, the concern is that I become too humble and too meek. I realize that from a purely religious point of view that is probably not possible. However, there is a point that humility and meekness stop being virtues and start becoming a negative impact on the life God intends. There comes a time when you can no longer allow people to walk over you or threaten your well being and must stand up. It is striking that balance that I struggle with most. The desire for preservation of my job, marriage and bonds of friendship and family pretty well prevent me from going to far on the mouthy side. It is only through prayer and reflection and meditation that I can find the balance and peace with that balance that God wishes me to have.
If you too struggle with this balance, please share ways that you have learned to better find it. May God bless you in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost. Amen
"If you want to be happy, really really happy, use your talents to serve others." - Eduardo Verastegui
The past few days have been such that really make me ponder if it might actually be better to walk away and start a new life that is as selfish as humanly possible. I know that such thoughts are sinful and that I my the proper response should be too pray more and worry less. Like many, I struggle with being grace-filled when times get tough. As a kid I had a smart mouth and I usually let it go whenever challenged.
Real or adult world relationships, both personal and professional, require me to put a governor, if you will, on my mouth What I am finding more and more is that my personal relationship with Jesus demands that I put a check not only on my mouth, but on my thoughts. As I am growing in my faith, I am growing in the appreciation that to Love my neighbor requires me to dial back my pride and my anger and grow in humility and meekness.
This of course, the concern is that I become too humble and too meek. I realize that from a purely religious point of view that is probably not possible. However, there is a point that humility and meekness stop being virtues and start becoming a negative impact on the life God intends. There comes a time when you can no longer allow people to walk over you or threaten your well being and must stand up. It is striking that balance that I struggle with most. The desire for preservation of my job, marriage and bonds of friendship and family pretty well prevent me from going to far on the mouthy side. It is only through prayer and reflection and meditation that I can find the balance and peace with that balance that God wishes me to have.
If you too struggle with this balance, please share ways that you have learned to better find it. May God bless you in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost. Amen
"If you want to be happy, really really happy, use your talents to serve others." - Eduardo Verastegui
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